A holiday: but not as you knew it…

The dictionary tells me that a 'Holiday' is 'an extended period of leisure, rest and recreation; usually describing being away from home.' I would like to rewrite that definition, so that it applies to the fools who have chosen to have (many) children. 'Holiday; an extended period of stress and harassment, involving keeping your children … Continue reading A holiday: but not as you knew it…

5 Signs You’re Having A Mum-Life Crisis

I can't say for sure; but I think I'm having a Mam-life crisis (the Geordie version of a Mum-life crisis). It's similar to the better known mid-life crisis in that it results in some erratic, questionable decision-making and results in the people who know you best barely recognising you. In a moment I'm going to … Continue reading 5 Signs You’re Having A Mum-Life Crisis

From Two Kids to Three: The Year 1 Audit

As with any big organisational change, it seems fitting for me to do a review of this whole 'Having three kids instead of the perfectly rational two kids that most other people have' malarkey. An audit if you like. Being an official report; I have broken it down into easy-to-digest sections for the auditors. Section … Continue reading From Two Kids to Three: The Year 1 Audit

How (not) To Discipline Your Kids

Seven and a half years into my parenting career; there is still so much I do not know. I still have so many questions. Questions I'm hoping you lovely readers can help me with. Some are lighthearted enough. For example; when will they stop telling me they're 'just going for a poo right?'. Seriously, when!? … Continue reading How (not) To Discipline Your Kids

How To Raise Little Boys Who Don’t Grow Into Sexist Arseholes

This morning I made a momentous decision. One which I hope will be impactful not only on my life; but on the lives of my (one day) adult sons. From now on; every time I perform any household or child-related chore; I am going to tell Rob about it. And not only will I tell … Continue reading How To Raise Little Boys Who Don’t Grow Into Sexist Arseholes

The Tragic Neglect of the Third Child (What’s your name again?)

The latest installment in my ever-increasing sphere of Mam-guilt; is that Ellis doesn’t ‘do’ anything. I mean; obviously he does loads. He says ‘Hey!’ lots, he crawls, he nearly walks, he claps, he laughs, he eats…all of that day-to-day shizzle; but he doesn’t have any ‘organised’ fun. This has led me to the wider pressing … Continue reading The Tragic Neglect of the Third Child (What’s your name again?)

Can you really reverse a vasectomy? Asking for a friend…

When we found out we were pregnant with number three; me and Rob agreed straight away that this was the last baby we'd have. I suggested that we just take early retirement from sex. We've had a very successful career and surely now that the breeding was finished, it was time we got our sexual … Continue reading Can you really reverse a vasectomy? Asking for a friend…