The last time I shaved my legs was the 12th of December. And I cannot even remember the last time I waxed my nether regions. Believe it.
Before you ask; no, I’m not part of the ‘Bring Back the Bush’ movement (I made that movement up but I’d put money on there actually being one).
And no; I have not given up on personal vanity and decided to let myself go altogether (although if you’ve seen me on the school run you’d be forgiven for thinking that was the case). Quite the opposite actually…
After years of considering it (and an unsuccessful course of IPL), I have invested in laser hair removal.
Now don’t get all angry at me if you prefer your Mary nice and hairy and rock your pit hair with pride. Each to their own I say! I actually hate the misogyny associated with hairlessness. Nobody should feel they have to shave/wax/laser themselves to within an inch of their lives in order to be deemed attractive.
But I’ve spent too much precious time battling the bristles, I just wanted to be able to take my kids swimming without needing a weeks notice and an industrial-sized tub of honking hair removal cream.
After loads of intense (and frankly rather confusing) Facebook and Google research, I stumbled upon the page for NC Clinic in Newcastle City Centre.
The reviews were fantastic and when I called to make my patch test appointment I got a really good feeling about the place. They sounded very professional and not at all like they would fleece you of hundreds of pounds only to leave you as hairy as the Gruffalo.
When I popped along for my patch test I knew I’d made a good find! A great central location with plenty of parking nearby.
The therapists Nikki and Cherry were both so lovely and put me at ease straight away. Being an OCD clean freak, I was relieved to see the place was so sparkling clean you could eat your dinner off the floor (although hopefully that will not be necessary). Cherry took me through a thorough check to make sure the treatment was appropriate for me and then we went ahead with the patch test.
The girls are both great craic, which comes in really handy when you need to be distracted from the stinging of the laser (more on that later!).
I’ve had two of my six sessions now and I cannot tell you how bloody brilliantly it is! Seriously! My friends are so bored of me rolling up my jeans every five minutes and insisting, shouting, begging in fact; ‘FEEL MY LEGS! GO ON! GO ON! YOU WON’T BELIEVE THEM!!!’
I’m trying to reign it in a bit in public cos I’m understandably getting some strange looks.
But seriously it’s like I’ve just had them waxed. Every. Single. Day.
The time I am saving is crazy, why didn’t I do this years ago!? I could’ve written a bloody book in the time that I’ve spent shaving my stubbly pins all these years!
Before I get any more evangelical, let’s address the question everybody asks about laser: Does it hurt like frigging hell?
Hmm… how best to answer this; let me put it this way; I’d say it’s more painful than waxing, but less painful than childbirth. Has that made it any clearer? I grant you that’s quite a wide range of pain.
Look, to be honest, I’m a complete wimp with that type of stuff. Nikki the laser therapist is very patient with me and every time I say ‘am I a total baby or does everyone whinge this much?’, she diplomatically says, ‘everyone has a different pain threshold…and yours is quite low…’
BUT, even with my pathetically low pain threshold I know it’s all worth it! An hour or so of discomfort for a lifetime of smooth legs and down-belows? Count me in!